I've had dreads a few times. Seems like everytime I've had to chop them off, I've regretted it. I then spend a couple years growing my hair back out so I can put them in again.

If you are really having doubts, maybe look at pictures from before you got dreads. That seemed to help me. My situation has never been a want to cut them off, but a social thing. I had to cut them off the first time to prove to a potential scholarship program that I was committed to school. The second time was for my teaching job. In the end though it really depends where you are in your life and what you want.

Peace,
Tucker

Ah…I was just going to post a related thread.
A month or so again I was having this weird little crisis where I felt very uncomfortable with who I am. I think it had to do with some people making comments about how I'm not very feminine. Anyway, one day I had this driving urge to cut off all my dreads, change out my hoop for a stud in my nose and start wearing more dressy/feminine clothes. When I told my partner how I was feeling he said "No! Don't, I love your dreads" and generally made me feel a little better.
So for a little while those urges went away and I felt ok about my style again…it helped that this little girl came up to me at a music festival just to tell me she liked my style…she also could have said smile but whatever, it was cute.
Then, all of a sudden I've had two dreams in a row where I've cut off my dreads. Both of them were because I got sick of my dreads and then after beginning to cut them off (about halfway through) I thought "Oh no, what have I done? I looked so much better before!"
I'd go with not cutting them off, but that's just because I've had these regret dreams myself, I don't know how you'd feel.
You might want to figure out exactly why you want to cut them off, just like how it's good to know why you are getting them, because dreads are a huge commitment, as is cutting them off.
Good luck
C

Do you mind if I ask you a question?... Not to change the subject.. but how did they fall off? Should I be worried??

Niki, I feel your pain about comments of your curls being nicer. Whenever I’m with my mom and someone comments on my dreads, she says they’re nice but then goes on about how much she loved my curly hair. One of my friends who, was completely against me dreading, always tells me how he misses my curls. But he’s warmed up to them a bit. Many of my friends say my dreads are nice ... with a tone that says they liked my natural hair better, lol. I have gotten a lot of positivity, too, though. The question should be: Do YOU like your dreads better than your curls? I love my curls but they’re a pain to take care of. Dreads are just so much fun and getting easier all the time. I’ve never been happier with my hair.

Cali, I know what you mean about not being very feminine... For me that comes with being 6 foot (about 183 cm), having really broad shoulders, being really strong, and never wearing any makeup, lol. The other day I was standing in a very busy store and a young boy was pushing a cart past me with his mother behind him. She said to her son, “Be careful! You almost hit him.” HIM!... She said him... LOL! I was just standing there... I wasn’t wearing something particularly feminine but it certainly was men’s clothing (unless we’re talking about emo men, maybe?). I seriously don't look like a guy, either -- she must have not been paying attention. But, seriously, dreads don’t have anything to do with how feminine you are. Don’t mistake femininity with being girly. You can still be extremely feminine with dreadlocks. Girly ... well, maybe not. I don’t know because I’ve never tried, lol. Anyway, you’ll be the most comfortable being whatever you love. If you give that up because of what other people are telling you, you’ll end up feeling like a fraud. If you love your dreads, keep ‘em!

Delcro - thanx for the tip.

re: feminine - I just don't see the issue. You are all lovely ladies (I say that with all respect, as a married man old enough to be your father) in every sense, dreads or no dreads. Anyone who disputes that is either blind or lying. Perhaps jealousy or insecurity? Perhaps your dreads represent to them, at least in their minds, something (freedom?) they feel they don't have? I don't know, but they sound nuts to me.

Interesting to find out others are also having the same internal conflict as I've been having. I'm kind of fed up with how much loose-hair crocheting and maintenance my dreads have been requiring (as a Virgo I can't just let them be fuzzy, it makes me crazy!). After I get them all neatly crocheted in, it's time to wash them again and the cycle begins all over again. Every week.

And then the little girls I nanny for keep asking me why I don't just cut my dreads off, and what made me wanna dread in the first place. So that got me thinking, and even spurred a dream where I had regular hair again. It wasn't a guilt dream, as the dreads were just magically straight hair all of a sudden. No cutting involved.

After I had decided I want to keep them in at least another year and a half (which would total 3 years), just to see them get long and prove to myself that I can stick with something I set out to do, I was at a health and wellness fair and looked at some other people with dreads. It felt to me like my dreads kind of complete my image of the healer that I'm working to be. It just fits. I can't really explain why... maybe it's a stereotype ingrained in my mind.

I like the way they look and get tons of compliments all the time. Mostly from older women who say they wish they could do the same to their hair. So I'm gonna keep 'em in and maybe over time I can make peace with them. It has been a test of patience since the very beginning, so I'm assuming this is a virtue I still need practice on.

I also have people (Mom included) always making comments about how beautiful, soft and shiny my hair was before I dreaded! It really got to me to the point where I also almost cut them off! But then I realized I would only be satisfying THEM! And most certainly not myself. I Love my hair the way it is... the look, the feel, the art, the style, how it makes me feel and how it completes my personality! We only live once. Things change all the time. Live with no regrets and try everything... Maybe I WON'T have dreads for the rest of my life. Maybe I cut them off tomorrow if I feel the urge. Point is, I Love them NOW while I have them. And I decided NO ONE'S gonna change my mind! How liberating...!
Blessings